A Writer’s Story: Take a Break!

I remember when I left working in television to pursue writing full time. It was a major decision. One of those crossroads of life kind of things. I got a lot of encouragement from my wonderful husband and many of my friends (although some had their opinions – click here), but I still had a lot of doubts. I didn’t know if I would actually be disciplined enough to focus on my writing with no one holding me accountable. Left to my own devices all day, I feared I would spend most of my time daydreaming. Distracting myself. In other words – not working.

It was a deep fear that I happened to relay to my therapist during one of our sessions (ahh therapy. A requirement for writers). And her reaction was priceless. When I told her I would be leaving my day job to pursue my dream of a writing career, she shook her head. Gave me a pitiful smile.

“Here it comes,” I thought to myself. The criticism. The condescending. The remarks that I had heard more than once already about how silly it was to quit a steady job to pursue something so… well, unsteady.

But instead, she just said. “Wow. I’m very sorry for you. Because you’re going to be the worst boss you ever had.”

Looking back on that comment now, I always laugh. It was like she knew me better than I knew myself. And what she knew, what she could see even on that first day of my new job as a self-employed struggling writer, was that I tend to be quite a workhorse. I push myself much harder and faster than the average Joe. Failure, or roadblocks, just make me push even harder. My therapist, in all her wisdom, wasn’t worried about me getting distracted and not making time to write. She was worried about me working myself silly and never taking a break.

There are definitely benefits to pushing oneself to the brink. With my determination and incredible drive, I have gotten further along this writer road than I ever thought I would. My debut novel came out in 2022 and has sold over 10,000 copies (click here for more info on that, and on all my published works). My fourth book is due to release in November (stay tuned!). I am currently toggling back and forth between two other brand new manuscripts, both of which I hope to finish in some form by the end of the year.

While that might sound like a lot, it doesn’t feel like a lot when you truly love what you do. And there’s not much I’m more passionate about than writing and books. I truly feel I was born to be a writer, and I spend every day as such. If I’m not actively drafting something, I’m planning something. Or researching something. Or outlining something. Or thinking of something. Pushing. Always pushing.

Then, a year or two ago, something strange began to happen. Which started coming on gradually at first. Building little by little with each passing day. And that something was a deep and heavy fatigue. Coming on so slowly, creeping in so stealthily, that I almost didn’t notice it at first. Or at least, it was easy enough to push through with an extra dose (or two!) of caffeine.

But there came a point when caffeine only took me so far. I would have two cups of coffee, maybe three, and only feel energized for a few minutes. I watched my work day start coming to an end a lot sooner than it used to. Seven o’clock turned into six. Then five. Suddenly, I was so tired that my workdays were ending around three-thirty, and I was dropping into bed well before nine. Only to wake up feeling even more exhausted, despite getting ample sleep.

Still, I pushed. I wrote an entire novel while I was feeling that miserable, and I truly believe the finished product reflected my exhaustion (I’m currently planning almost a total rewrite, if that tells you anything). It wasn’t that it was a bad novel. It just wasn’t as polished and fine-tuned as my finished drafts usually are. It felt a bit sluggish, much like my entire body did.

It was my husband who finally talked some sense into me. “Mel,” he said gently. “When is the last time you took a break?”

Hmmm. It was like he was speaking in strange tongues that I didn’t understand. Take a break. Like I had the time or even the interest to do that! But the more I thought about it, the more I realized it had been, in fact, quite some time since I took a break. While early in my self-employed writer career I took regular hiatuses, those days had long-since come to a halt. The introduction into my life of deadlines, pub dates, rounds and rounds of edits, and the pressures to keep producing new material had put the brakes on hiatuses. It had been years since I had taken any significant time off.

It was a tough thing to admit, but my husband was right (don’t tell him I said so). I definitely needed a break. So, I went to my boss. I looked at her in the mirror, and I talked her into giving me some time off. She agreed that my color was a bit pale. My energy a bit low. “Yes,” my reflection finally said back to me. “Some time off I think would be good for you.”

I got myself as prepared as I could. I got each open writing project to a healthy stopping point. I put some updates up on my website and blog. I organized the home research library and got it ready to be shut down for quite some time. A whole month, as it would turn out.

My first day “off the clock” was a bit rough. I mostly wondered around the house trying to figure out what the hell I was supposed to be doing if not writing, researching, reading, outlining, or plotting. But it didn’t take me long to figure it out. Resting. You’re supposed to be resting!

So, I rested. I went on walks. Slow, mindful walks instead of fast-paced, places to go and people to see walks. My husband and I took a long weekend away. I went with the family on a camping trip out in the Indiana wilderness. I spent more than one afternoon lounging in front of the TV with a cat (or three) on my lap. I also got caught up on some overdue medical appointments. Which clued me into the fact that there was indeed some physical stuff going on (some quite low iron levels that were definitely contributing to the fatigue). The more time I gave myself, and the more I took my new iron pills and got back to exercising, the more I felt that well starting to refill. You know, the one deep inside that needs some TLC every now and again. Slowly but surely, the rain was returning. Water was trickling its way back in.

A few weeks later, there came a morning when I sat up in bed and felt incredibly refreshed. I enjoyed the feel of the sun on my face. I reveled in the happy sound of my alarm going off. I felt ready, more than ready, to get back to work.

It was a very solid reminder of something very important. Taking a break is a very crucial part of the writing process. Because writing, whether it’s a book, a poem, a short story, or even keeping up with posts on a blog, takes a lot from the well. I think all art and creative work takes a bit of a toll, because a tremendous amount of energy and emotion goes into it. If you don’t take a pause to put water back in the well, you’ll run dry. You’ll get tired. Your iron will drop (just kidding, your iron is probably fine). You might even get the dreaded burnout. Which, trust me, is a force to be reckoned with.

Which brings me to this post. You can rest assured (is that a pun? I think so!) that I’m feeling much better now. I feel so much better now that I’m only just realizing how unwell I really was getting. But the energy has returned (as have the puns!). The iron levels are recovering. I’m back at my desk every day. But I’m a bit nicer to myself this time around. I take walk breaks during the day. I give myself some time in the morning to slowly dive in. I stretch if I feel stiff. Because I like feeling better. I like the refreshing feel of a mind rested. Of a soul restored. Of a full well.

So, I wanted to spread the word. To take some time to remind the writer universe just how important it is to take a break. It doesn’t have to be an entire month like I did. You don’t have to let it get that bad. Right now, you can close the computer and go for a walk. Take in some nature. Go smell a flower. Give your pet some love. Do something that will get the water trickling into that well.

You’ll find that a lot of the knots you couldn’t work through suddenly come untied. Weight gets taken off your back. You have the energy to read that tired draft of a new manuscript, and you have energy to dive back into it and fix it.

Take a break. Enjoy it. You’ve earned it.

And don’t put off your medical appointments!

 

All photos by M.B. Henry. For more of my photography – click here

FLIGHT OF THE HUMMINGBIRD Pre-Order Links will be coming very soon! You won’t want to miss this story of Interwar Germany, the rise of the Nazis, and one family’s terrifying grapple with Hitler’s evil. Click Here for more information on that, and to learn more about all of my published works!